PovertyChallenge

I have been able to give my opinion now for a couple of days and I still feel a bit stunted in my approach to what I can say.  I am very glad that the challenge has ended but it has given me a renewed sense of what it means to be voice poor. 

I really hope I never have to experience that as a permanent condition but I am glad I have attempted to even vaguely understand the oppression many people in the world face.  I will of course never understand the social, physical, emotional and mental limitations that affect the voice of a person but it is absolutely essential that we address this and remember that poverty is not only always about money and food. 

Poverty of voice can affect all of that and be very detrimental to a person's right to self development.  For me, at least for now, this is where this form of poverty ends.  I will endeavour in my professional and personal work to continue to advocate for the voices of marginalised persons to be heard both at home and abroad.

Thank you Oxfam and Nicola Sansom for initiate my thinking in this direction.

My boyfriend Adam and I decided to go to Birmingham for my friend Katherine's birthday but we had to stop to get Adam some jeans that he could go out in.  I probably do not have to tell you how utterly useless to his shopping experience I was and his reaction was "you know what? Let's not bother, this is completely pointless".  I knew he needed to get some jeans to I had to pause for a moment and to avoid a divorce on the shop floor of T.K Maxx, let him know when I didn't think the trousers were completely hideous.  Divorce didn't happen and we walked away with a nice pair of jeans for him.

We met Katherine in Birmingham centre where she was picking up a few things.  We went to a shop where she tried on what I thought were completely horrendous looking shoes with a mirrored bow on the side that she was very close to buying.  I had to make throwining up noises on the side to make it clear what my thoughts were on them.  I believe that was more a service to the community and to Katherine's feet than a gratuitous opinion giving frenzy.

The day ended at The Glee Club, a comedy club in the centre of Birmingham and it was all going quite well because the very first act was not that funny but as the evening went on, the comedy got so good I was nearly crying with laughter. 

I had failed yet again.

Apologies for the lack of an update for the past two days! I'm now able to catch up with you guys about how awfully my challenge has spiralled out of control!

Thursday was meant to be the only day where I would give myself the liberty to speak, due to the fact that a group assignment I had to start and finish on the day would contribute towards my course mark, so I do not apologise for talking then! However, since that afternoon, it's been just too hard to keep quiet! The group assignment was the last task in a module we have now completed on my course, and my friends went for a little drink to celebrate. I therefore joined them, and from that moment I have not been able to keep silent for longer than half an hour at a time!

When no-one's around, most people would believe that I would talk as much as I want to fill in the silence, and no-one would know, however this is not the case. To keep as true to the challenge as possible, I have even refrained from speaking out loud to myself behind closed doors (and seeing as I can't amuse myself with late night solo karaoke to my iTunes, it is almost an impossible task!!) but now I've even let go on that front.

Thursday evening spelled disaster when I had to return home to not-so-sunny Lichfield for the weekend, and it took just 15 minutes for my parents to break me! I only saw them up to twice last year during each term, if that, and this year hasn't been much different, so I hope those of you doing similar challenges this week, or those who don't see their family as often as they would like, will forgive me just this one time! If the challenge was on any normal week, things might have gone a bit more smoothly, but alas, I am very weak-willed. I cherish the fact that I can say whatever I like and not be afraid of the consequences of my words. Unfortunately, other people in different countries don't have that luxury.

Some of my favourite programmes on TV are satirical comedy shows, and if anyone in a country like Cuba, North Korea etc. were to lampoon their government/media in the same way, I can assure you they wouldn't be around for very long. So many little things contribute to the restrictions placed on those who are not allowed to express an opinion, whereas we take the ability for granted. The last few days have really shown me that when it has almost been physically awkward for me not to speak in certain situations!

Hope I haven't rambled on for too long for you, but to end on a happier note, I've just chanced upon a BBC article which gives a more promising outlook to China's state of affairs when it comes to communication: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-11576592 

It's definitely worth a read! Oh and by the way, Thursday's exam and assignments were not that bad! And a good hearty meal afterwards always puts a smile on my face!

It's bonfire night tonight, went to a fantastic display with some friends but how do you watch fireworks without voicing an opinion?

No WOWs or AHHHHs or OOOOHs, it was hard but inside me I was jumping up and down with excitement. 

At a comedy club tomorrow.............really not a great week to have no opinion.

I think I learnt the importance of women only spaces tonight.  We went out for a drink and dinner and just talked about stuff.  I was still accutely aware of my challenge but felt like I could loosen my tongue a little being in a woman only space.......and the wine did help a little.

I realised I didn't feel quite so exposed or that I was breaking the challenge as I do in a mixed sex setting.  I just found that an interesting point to note.

I finished a blog yesterday and tried to post it but the computer decided to undo all my work and I believe I was justified it giving it a piece of my mind.

What I wrote about yesterday was that I had written my MP Andrew Gwynne expressing my disappointment at our global slow down on halving poverty by 2015. He responded promptly but spoke more about international issues on poverty and the voiceless.  This therefore led me to rethink my angle on this, I think I have to date placed too much emphasis on the voiceless people in far away "brown people" countries and not so much on the voiceless in our nation.

Within represention in the UK there are still vulnerable voices that do not get heard. Women, ethnic minorities, gay people, the elderly, disable people, transgender people. If you are unfortunate enough to have multiple identities, a black disabled gay female over 60yrs old with caring responsibilities, well it's your own fault and your voice should definitely not be heard in the mainstream.  When policy decisions are made or services are designed, it is important to get those marginalised voices heard. A transport system will not affect a single man with no caring responsibilities the same way it affects a woman who has to drop her kids off at nursery, take care of an elderly relative before she goes into work.  All policy implementation must consult appropriately with people it will affect. We cannot make assumptions about those that are "hard to reach", "seldom heard" or have "hidden voices."  If people feel like they deserve a say in something and that say will be listened to, just watch them speak!

My friend Helen read through my blog and wondered along the same lines as me, how different would this be if everyone around me actively force my voice down? Or perhaps took whatever ideas I dared voice and presented it as their own.

Didn't like the thought of that.



Today's horoscope for Leo must have just read epic fail, because that's what today has resulted in. Firstly, I would just like to say that staying silent whilst ordering a Subway sandwich is not a viable option, especially if the staff are about to put those nasty plastic cheese triangles on your sandwich! And secondly, revision with your friends is too hard to do when you can't help anyone else, which made me break the rules not an hour ago and help my friend.

If I was attached to a shock collar for this week, I would have died of electrocution tonight! But tonight I only spoke in helping my friend, and it was all in the name of altruism, which, at the end of the day, is what charities try to undertake in helping the impoverished. So my conscience should let me off just this once, right?

Wrong. At first I only foresaw the poster task in the exam itself as my only stumbling block, but a question from a stranger or a hilarious quip from my friends can just solicit an unconscious reaction to reply, and that isn't helpful to me at all! And it isn't strengthening my message to raise the awareness of those in dire straits due to their government's harsh and unfair restrictions on their voice as a collective. Tip for the week: MUST WORK HARDER.

And I leave you tonight with my mid-week paper collection update! My notepad has been the extension of my vocal chords this week, and already my thoughts are generating the need for trees to topple! Don't worry, I am planning to recycle it all as soon as the challenge is over to ensure that I'm not failing at helping to combat climate change either! And I do apologise for the mitigating circumstances tomorrow, I just really don't want to fail my degree!! 

This is getting quite hard now, I find myself watching everything I'm saying and this seems to translate into considering every action I make.  So I find myself trying very hard to stop and think before I use my mouth really- to eat or speak.  I guess it's just a heightened sense of a part of the body that I'm paying attention to. 

My body language also seems to be changing and I seem to dip or bow my head when I feel myself thinking and wanting to voice an opinion.  I also had a discussion/argument with my boyfriend Adam about the Foreign Office travel warnings (details are irrelevant) but I expressed a thought he disagreed with.  Before I knew it, it had become an opinion filled discussion.  As soon as I realised I that I had started expressing opinions I stopped and had to leave the room.  I got a bit annoyed at myself for both breaking my challenge but also at the thought of having to desist mid-argument, an argument that I was totally winning as well (he wouldn't agree).

Anyway, tonight my friend came round to tell us about her engagement, her boyfriend proposed to her last Sunday.  I couldn't help myself and simply had to gush over the ring and over did the opinions about where they should get married, how beautiful the ring is, what style the wedding would be. 

Considerations from today

• I feel like the longer this goes on the more I could embed the lessons and retain a permanent stoop
• This is really hard and I am so lucky to be around people that even listen to me
• I wonder how much more different it would be if everyone around me also felt that I did not deserve an opinion and shut me up every time I tred like in the case of domestic violence victims, not having the vote, having a say in local decision making etc

It's only day 2 and my challenge is already going down the pan - I got an E-mail saying that my tuition fees had not been paid and if the problem was not sorted I would be 'financially suspended' from university! This unfortunately broke my silence with a phone call to Student Services, nevertheless I will soldier on!

It's hard to go through most of the day wihtout being able to talk - my friends are generally hilarious and banterful, and it's so hard to stand by and not throw my two cents in! One of my friends Emma said today it was 'as if I actually had lost my voice', does that mean they miss the sound of my voice, or that I probably just talk too much? (Probably yeahhh)

Luckily I haven't had to make any other phone calls, and my friends know not to call me, cause all they'll hear is me breathing! (Scream much?) At least I can text them to my heart's content! Unfortunately, people in many other countries who also enjoy privileges like mobile phones and instant messaging are in fear of their own government screening their conversations! If any content present could be seen as creating dissent or denouncing the image of the state, that person could land in very hot water. This Orwellian-style spying on the nation isn't right.

I'm off to a poverty debate now, where I will be 'speaking' if you know what I mean! :D

I am embarking on a Poverty Challenge that aims to highlight the Poverty of Voice. 

For me, this is about the millions of people in the world who still do not and cannot have a say in their lives, what is done to them, how it is done and what is done in their name.  This ranges voices in open spaces covering politics and democracy- the right to vote- to voice is closed spaces where people endure what life throws at them and there is no mechanism or ear to listen to their voices.

I hope to be able to draw attention to the 'hardly heard' voices in society and ask my MP what he is doing to ensure that those voices are heard and resources exist so that the voices that begin to emerge do not disappear and stopped being listened to.

I believe that having a voice is so fundamental to being able to live and fulfil one's potential.  As a naturally outspoken person who has an opinion on nearly everything I am intrigued to see how this week will go.